Wanting
by Green Kneesocks
Summary: People Under the Stairs. Sequel to Kissing is Addictive. Alice wants something but he doesn't know what it is. Roach knows what it is but is afraid to take that plunge.
1. Is it bad? Am I bad

A/N: Here is the sequel to Kissing is Addictive. I've bumped the rating up to M for reasons which will soon be apparent. This has also been approved by Sodapop765 so no worries people. If you all like these little one shots and ficlets then maybe I'll do a longer one. Enjoy!

Touching, in Alice's opinion, was the most amazing thing in the world. She was in her room watching the sunset beyond the trees. Downstairs her parents were making dinner together. She wondered if they ever kissed like she and Roach kissed. If they ever touched and like she and Roach touched? If the want which coursed through her veins had ever inhabited them as well? What this feeling even was! She went away from her window sat down on her bed facing the TV. There was something on channel 11 on about the animals of the rainforest. Normally she'd be engrossed in something like this, cramming eveyr single piece of information about the world into her mind. Now Roach dominated her thoughts…more so than normal.

"What's the matter with me?" said Alice softly to herself. Now Roach was gone but the heat they had generated within her was still there. It was like the last embers of a roaring fire except she wasn't sure if she wanted it to be put out.

"You want the long or the short version?" asked her big sister Debbie from the doorway. Alice sat up more rigidly, like she did when Mommy would enter the room. Alice knew what she was doing was bad and she didn't want these people, her real parents, to know and then get rid of her. She certainly didn't want to go back to Mommy and Daddy. Besides, with them being in jail such a thing would be impossible.

"Hello, Debbie." Said Alice. Debbie strode through her two years younger sister's room like she owned the place and plopped down unceremoniously next to Alice on the bed. Alice felt uncomfortable, as if Debbie could see into her thoughts like Mommy said she could and then see how bad she had been with Roach.

"Oh my God you will not believe what happened today! Ok, so me and Donna were, like, totally just hanging out at Dairy Queen you know, minding our own business, when…ugh! Rose Merril comes strolling in, you remember Rose, the ugly slut who stole Donna's one and only. Well she just comes strolling in with him and sits in the table right behind us!" said Debbie quickly. Alice nodded and tried to follow the details. She liked hearing about Debbie's day, the world was so interesting and Debbie was her window to it.

"That's bad?" said Alice. She knew how Donna must have felt, when she thought Roach died it had left a gaping hole where her heart used to be. To have another girl steal your one and only…well then that must have been hell. Still, at least they hadn't sat in the table with Debbie and Donna. That would have been terrible.

"See, even you know that's a bitch move! You can see that and you're, like, a total Martian when it comes to people." Said Debbie kicking off her gel sandals. This was one of the reasons she liked Alice; even though she was kidnapped and held prisoner away from the world she still instinctively knew the important things…even if her sense of style was questionable.

"Sorry." Said Alice looking down. Debbie playfully nudged her on the shoulder.

"It's not your fault, remember? You were like, two, when you got kidnapped. I'd have done something but I was only four at the time. Anyway she sits right there, looks right at Donna, and says 'Sorry about your crazy brother' in the most absolutely bitchiest tone I've ever heard." Said Debbie

"What did Donna do?" asked Alice. She hoped Donna hit the other girl, nobody got away with insulting Roach. He was the most amazingly, wonderfully, perfect, person in the world.

"She took a sip of her milkshake, turned that stupid camera she's always lugging around on, pointed it right at the slut, and said 'I hope you're talking about my ten year old brother Morgan and not my fifteen year old mute and abused brother David Jr. because it's one thing to pick on a little kid because at least he can verbally defend himself, unlike my mute, mutilated, and abused little brother.' Then she totally just got up and walked out. I flipped them off and then we kicked it around some other places. What'd you do today?" asked Debbie. Alice stammered and blushed before focusing her attention back onto the TV.

"Ooh! Allie's been a bad, bad, girl. Do tell, baby sister, do tell." Said Debbie getting too close for comfort. When Alice tried to focus on the TV Debbie just turned it off. She wanted to know what happened and who it happened with. Allie deserved a little happiness today.

"Roach came over today…" said Alice. She knew, objectively, that telling would be bad but she could never keep things to herself when asked a direct question. Lies of omission were just as bad as regular lies to Mommy and Daddy.

"Ooh! Allie and David Jr., alone in this big, empty house all day. How far did you let him get?" asked Debbie. From what she could tell David Cullen Jr., otherwise known as Roach, wasn't like the other guys and not just because he was missing his tongue. He didn't just care about getting in Allie's pants, or rather up her dress, he cared about her as a person. He stayed in that house, took a bullet, and then jumped out of a two story window into a shallow pond for her. Yeah…look up the perfect boyfriend in the dictionary or whatever and you'd see his picture.

"Well, we kissed a lot…" said Alice. Debbie then looked closely at her baby sister and noticed the messed up makeup.

"Go on." Said Debbie. She had some Cherry Garcia ice cream in the freezer for when Allie finally popped hers. Alice played with the fabric of her dress…she wasn't sure how Debbie would react to her being bad. Maybe not badly at all because she and Donna had been bad with boys before.

"…he touched me." Said Alice. Debbie squealed and kicked her legs in the air with, what Alice assumed, was happiness.

"I am so happy for you! See, it's not bad at all, is it? And you know what?" said Debbie already planning on making cherry Sundays for them.

"What?" asked Alice timidly. Debbie could be just as scary when she was happy as she could when she was angry. Not that Debbie's anger had ever been directed at her, though.

"It's not bad for a girl to like being touched either. Where exactly did he…?" said Debbie motioning to Alice's body. Alice somehow managed to turn the exact same shade of red as a perfectly ripened tomato.

"My face, mostly, and my arms and back." said Alice. Debbie put her thoughts of Sundays to a halt. She blew a lock of errant, brown hair out of her face. Oh Allie…poor, poor, Allie.

"Nowhere else?" asked Debbie. Alice shook her head no. Debbie looked almost disappointed for some reason.

"Well, did you want him to touch you in any specific place? Did anywhere feel like it wanted to be touched?" asked Debbie in her best 'I'm listening, I'm understanding, and I'm not judging voice.' She had heard her parents use that a million times before so she thought she got it down pretty well.

"I felt…I mean there was…like a heat or a wanting. I wanted him to touch…well bad places. Please don't tell real mother and father!" said Alice. Debbie got a mock thoughtful look on her face and she rubbed her chin, deep thought style.

"Nah, I think they can live good, long lives, without knowing about this. Oh and Allie?" said Debbie. Alice looked up and met her big sister's eyes which were filled with amusement.

"What?" asked Alice. Debbie got a very serious look on her tanned, perfectly made up face…in her opinion at least.

"Every girl, no woman, has those parts. They're not bad and neither is wanted him to touch them. If he makes you do anything you're not one hundred percent sure about doing then that would be wrong. Otherwise follow your instincts and tell me how it goes and I won't tell mom and dad, I promise. Now let's see if there's any decent food around here." Said Debbie. Alice smiled and nodded. She wasn't one hundred percent sure about the whole, it not being bad thing, but it was nice to have someone on her side.


	2. So as long as it's for her, it's not bad

A/N: Now we'll get to hear from Roach's family. I always loved them but I made a few small changes. Trysta is twelve in this, not ten, so her relationship with Fool will be less squicky. Also, Donna and  
Debbie are friends in this and she shares a room with Trysta and Dot. Morgan and Roach share a room too. Also, Fool lives near them. Enjoy!

Roach sat down on the floor under the kitchen table staring at a book. He had started out reading the thickest book in the house, War and Peace, in an effort to take his mind off of Alice. It wasn't work in the slightest amount. He wasn't even reading anymore, just staring at the words as rthey crawled across the page. What was wrong with him?

"Are you playing fort?" asked his six year old sister, Dottie, as she crawled across the cold linoleum and under the old table. Roach shook his head no and then motioned to the dusting of dirt on her overalls and pink t-shirt. What was it with girls and the color pink?

"No, me and Morgan were digging to China but then Dad got mad and made us fill in the hole." Said Dottie

"_You look like pig pen."_ Wrote Roach. Dottie brushed some of the dirt off of herself.

"Yeah, I guess I do. Well, you look like a giant Mr. five foot nine and growing." Said Dottie. Roach closed the book and tapped Dottie playfully on the head with it. She laughed, it was nice when she laughed. It was completely different from the way Alice laughed, as it should have been considering that Dottie was his sister, but it was still nice.

"Did I ever tell you that you were the nicest, smartest, bestest big brother in the whole wide world?" said Dottie sweetly

"_What do you want?"_ asked Roach. Dottie's sweet smile faltered, he saw through her like grandma's underpants.

"Can I call Messenger? I'd ask Dad but he went to work and I'd ask Donna but she's in our room really, really, mad about something." Said Dottie. Hard, heavy steps could be heard coming down through the ceiling followed by some muffled cursing. Roach nodded yes. Dottie smiled and gave him an air hug because he didn't like to be touched.

"Yay!" said Dottie. She crawled out from under the table with speed only a six year old could possess. Roach came out much more slowly and stretched the kinks out of his bones. The sound of the rotary dial phones filled the kitchen with its melodic sounds which mixed with Donna's pacing and Dottie's excited squealing.

"May I please speak to Messenegr Robeson, please? This is Dorothea Louisa Francesca Bianca Lonna Rebecca Cullen, sister of David Mathias Cullen…I dunno, Anita that's just what my named me….well it's better than everyone calling me Headbanger…Miracle's a good name for your baby I guess…hi Messenger! The number of the day was eleven today…and the letter was D like for Dot! I know, they almost never go over ten…so what are you up too?" said Dottie. Roach laughed a bit as she twisted a lock of her brown hair between her fingers like Trysta did when she talked to Fool. He was grateful that she had taken his mind off of Alice…and now his mind was right back there again. Great. He sighed and went into the living room to continue to stew in the feelings Alice had stirred up.

"You will not believe what happened at Dairy Queen today! Also I got you a scoop of bubblegum fudge ripple delight, it's in the freezer." Said Donna as she came into to the room with her video camera trained on him.

"(Thank you.)" said Roach as best he could. Ice cream sounded wonderful right then, especially bubblegum fudge ripple delight, the best flavor in the world. Well, second best only to Alice. And yes, he could taste, just not as well as normal people.

"Uh, you're welcome? Anyway, God, I had the worst time! Debbie says we're going to hang out at her place away from the prying eyes of the world after the terrible awful thing happened-" said Donna

"_That thing with the girl who stole your boyfriend?" _wrote Roach. Donna took a moment out of her tirade and sat next to him, the camera never leaving her hands.

"Yeah, that bitch! Anyway, Debbie drags me out to Dairy Queen and we stay there, like, all day just eating ice cream because the guy she likes works there. So we're there, she's filling me with ice cream so I'll break out again, and then the bitch and that pathetic excuse for a human being show up and you know what happened?" said Donna her breath getting heavy, the veins on the sides of her head pulsing. She looked kinda like dad when he found Morgan's pee bottle.

"(What?)" asked Roach. Donna softened. Poor David Jr., he did not need people he didn't even know making fun of him for things that were out of his control. She didn't want to make him feel bad, poor guy had enough problems as it was.

"Oh nothing interesting. So, what'd you do today?" asked Donna. Roach felt his face heating up almost instantly as he remembered his day with Alice. He shifted his book onto his lap and turned the TV on.

"(Lucy's on.)" said Roach motioning towards the TV. Donna gasped, a million scenarios running through her head, none of them innocent.

"You and Alice did it?" whispered Donna. Roach gave her a hurt look. Did she really think he was capable of something as terrible as that?

"_I would never do anything to hurt Alice." _Wrote Roach. Donna was sixteen, she knew the implications of implications of those eight words. She took the remote from his hands and turned off the TV. This was not the time for Lucy.

"David Jr.,…why would you think that it would hurt Alice? Well yeah, it hurts the first few times but it's not a bad thing. I mean, mom and dad do it all the time, do you think dad would ever hurt mom?" said Donna feeling embarrassed herself. She sent those feelings away, this was not the time for silly teenage squeamishness. Roach looked very thoughtful at that moment. He had been hurt and he would never hurt her like that but his parents did it all the time…maybe they were trying to make another baby or something.

"_Are they trying to have another baby?" _wrote Roach. He assumed that girls put themselves through that to make a baby like Headbanger had. Messenger kept telling him that girls like it too and nothing bad could make something as perfect at the unborn child within his wife, Headbanger, which might not even have been Messenger's in the first place.

"Hell no! There's already five of us, David Jr." said Donna. She briefly got a nightmare vision of wading through a sea screaming, vomiting babies…she shuddered.

"_Then why?"_ wrote Roach. Donna took a deep calming breath. This was not how she imagined spending her summer vacation. She imagined lazy days at the beach and in front of the TV, not frantic calls from their mother at the hospital in the middle of the night telling them that their little brother had been found and he was almost dead…a great start to summer. Well, that had been months ago, enough time for David Jr. to get used to her enough to ask about their parents sex life. Joy.

"Because they want to express their love, I guess. Girls like it too, I swear on our mother's grave." Said Donna. Roach gave her a look.

"Ok, her future grave. Anyway, whatever you and Alice do together just make sure she wants to. If all else fails just ask her what she wants to do and when. I'm not going to tell you what to do or how to do it because that's getting way too weird." Said Donna turning off her camera and going into the kitchen to kick Dottie off the phone so she could discuss these developments with Debbie, her best friend, unfortunately.


	3. The edge of the abyss

A/N: Ok back to Roach and Alice now. If you guys want me to write a long fic about them you need only ask.

It had been one week and Roach still hadn't touched Alice. It wasn't that he didn't want to and it wasn't like Alice didn't want to touch him, the opportunity just hadn't come up. Roach's week was full of doctor's appointments, dentist appointments, and visits to relatives and Messenger. Alice's week had been filled with what her so called real parents referred to as quality time. it consisted of trying to take her out into the world and doing what they considered fun activities. The museum hadn't been so bad because they went there on an early weekday morning when it was almost empty and she had learned about people in other parts of the world. The fabric store was Ok too, not many people and plenty of new fabrics. Clothes shopping was out though, too big and too many people. Currently she was sitting next to Roach on his couch watching TV with his little brother and his sisters. This was too many people too.

"Roach?" whispered Alice leaning back into his chest. Roach reached out and put his arms around her shoulder. This was nice, perfect except for the presence of his siblings as they watched Lucy attempt to make wine by crushing grapes under her feet. It looked like fun.

"Yeah?" said Roach quietly into her ear. She shuddered and made an almost undetectable sound. She was promptly shushed by Morgan, Trysta, Dottie.

"Too many people." Whispered Alice. Donna gave them both a look and then scooted away from them. Roach took Alice's hand in his, his thumb rubbing across the top of her hand. He got up and she followed as he led her to her room. Morgan jumped up and laid down across their former places on the couch.

"Hey, you don't get to lay down!" Dottie's voice could be heard as they made their way up that stairs. Roach led her to the door of his and Morgan's bedroom. Before she could say anything he put a finger over her lips and then kissed her deeply, like adults. The want was back after a week of lying low, just at the back of their minds. Alice reached over and hooker held arms around Roach's neck pulling herself up over to him. They were close now, very close. He reached behind her and opened the door. They broke apart long enough the negotiate their way into the bedroom, past the sheet which divided the room between him and Morgan, and led her down to his bed. She laid down, her hair making a silky pillow around her. She sat up and held his hand, her eyes filled with want and trust. He sat next to her, the bed creaking underneath his thin frame.

"Roach, remember what you said, the day we escaped? You know, before you jumped out the window so your body could break my fall?" said Alice breathing heavily. Roach nodded slowly.

"Well, I love you too. I just thought you should know that. I love you and I trust you more than anyone else in the world." Said Alice. He watched her face, her eyes, she wasn't lying. He felt a sort of a warmth growing within himself, a longing for her. He wanted her right then and there in a way he had never thought possible. He held her by the side of her face and kissed her as deeply as someone with their tongue cut out could do.

"Oh Roach." Said Alice breaking away from him for air. She felt like she had just finished running for her life. She was breathing heavily, sweating, but a feeling of warmth and perfection coursed through her. she leaned over and kissed him while, acting purely on instinct, put her tongue tentatively into his mouth. He froze. This was new. Amazing. Alice became a bit bolder, kissing him deeply as she had seen her big sister do to boys on occasion. The inside of his mouth tasted like…cranberry sauce. It was warm and odd, feeling what was left of his tongue against her.

"(I love you.)" said Roach before working on her neck. He kissed her there, little lingering kisses that made her toes curl and her thighs rub together. He kissed and sucked at her neck, trying not to leave any marks. He kissed down her neck and passed her collar bone as he unbuttoned her dress down the front. He looked at her for permission.

"H-Here." Said Alice. She took her hands away from around her and unbutton the front of her dress all the way down. Roach took in a shuddery breath as he saw her breasts for the first time, encased in a white lacy bra. He just sort of sat there, staring like he was privy to some secret she was sharing with him. Alice worried. Why wasn't he doing or saying anything. Was she ugly? Did he not want to? He looked like he wanted to see her that way just a minute ago. Nobody but Mommy, real mother, and Debbie had ever seen her in any state of undress and it had never been like this. Roach reached out a shaky hand put on second thought pulled it back. It was like he was standing at the end and the beginning of something at the same time. He remembered what Donna said and he watched her face for her reaction.

"Please, touch me." Said Alice softly. Roach obliged her, tentatively running his hands down her chest stopping just short of her breasts. He barely touched the top when Alice gasped and arched her back. suddenly his hands were filled with those wonderful, amazing, mounds of flesh. She moaned in a way he had never heard her moan before. He wasn't sure want to do now, Messenger's awkward and stilted but thorough lectures focused on what to do below the waist. He felt her nipples through her bra and experimentally ran his thumb across them making her gasp and squirm but in a good way.

"That's nice." Said Alice. She felt like she was positively on fire with wanting now. She continued to rub her thighs together, it felt sort of good. There was a wetness there which she assumed was sweat. Roach was touching her breasts while he kissed her neck now. This was so bad, so dirty, so sinful, and she loved it. She imagined Mommy now, just her, locked behind some glass case like the fish in the fish tank at home. She would be screaming at Alice, threatening her, telling her how bad she was. There was nothing she could do. Nothing at all she could do from stopping Alice from feeding into the fire she and Roach had started. She leaned completely against the wall now, letting Roach continue on with what he was doing.

"(Alice.)" said Roach. He wanted to say more, so much more, but his thoughts were all jumbled in his head like a jigsaw puzzle. He felt a familiar ache between his legs but did nothing about it. This was only for Alice so it was alright. She looked happy, blissful even. He wondered if she was feeling the same way he was. How did girls feel during this? For him it was a need to touch, to move, to move within her. She was rocking back and forth moving her thighs together. He was dubious of Messenger's claims of girls liking it, from what he had seen in the cellar they had never looked like Alice did right there. Well, Headbanger maybe but he hadn't been watching her and Messenger too closely. He wondered…if she didn't like this he's apologize, never do it again, and then make her a present. He took a shaking hand away from her breast and to her warm, smooth thigh. He watched her as she pushed his hand ever so slowly up her dress. Alice felt the heat between her legs increase every second that Roach spent lingering around there. She knew it was her bad place, even if Debbie said it wasn't, she was conflicted about letting Roach touch her there. She remembered what Debbie had said, she wasn't one hundred percent about this. She didn't want him to stop though. She just didn't want him to think she was bad. But every girl had that and the feelings that went with it, according to Debbie, and Debbie hadn't lied to her. It was Mommy who had been lying all those years. She took his hand and pushed it all the way up her dress until he was touching her there. They didn't move for what felt like years but was, in reality, only a few seconds.

"Please, David. Touch me there." Said Alice more sure of this than she had ever been of anything in her life. Roach reached for the band of her underwear and slowly pulled them down to her weak and shaky knees. He reached a tentative hand into her wetness. He then tried to recall everything Messenger had ever told him about touching girls there while simultaneously not thinking about how Messenger learned how to do this. He focused his attention onto the nubby thing between her legs watching her face as he experimentally touched it.

"Oh my God!" said Alice almost loud enough for someone to hear her. This was like nothing she had ever felt before. It was like there was a storm within her gaining strength with each touch of his disproportionately long fingers. She way laying down now, her breath coming up hitched and deep. She rocked back and forth against his hand, making noises she had never known she could make.

"Don't stop! For the love of God don't stop." Begged Alice as she felt every part of her catch fire. She could hear the little squelches that came with every stroke of his fingers, hear his own breathing coming out deep and hitched. She took in a deep, shuddery breath and closed her thighs around his hand. It felt like she had exploded, but in a good way.

"Thank you." Said Alice softly as she sat up again. She pulled her soaking wet underwear back up and just leaned against him. She watched the storm of emotions play across his face. He looked at her, really looked at her like he had never seen her before, and kissed her.

"(You're welcome.)" said Roach simple still not comprehending that he had made Alice come. He shifted a bit, his own pants having become uncomfortably sticky in the process of taking Alice to the heights of pleasure.

"Roach?" asked Alice tentatively, her thoughts still a mess after what had happened. She felt a little bit selfish, not making Roach feel good in return.

"Yeah?" asked Roach quietly still taking everything in. She loved him, she had said so. She loved him and he had made her come.

"Can I touch you? There?" asked Alice. Roach looked right into her eyes, into her very soul. He shook his head no.

"_Only for you." _Wrote Roach. Letting Alice touch him would put this into bad territory. He'd never use her like that. He laid Alice down and then himself next to her and they took an afternoon nap still basking in the glow of what they had done.


End file.
